Encouraging Real Restoration

I can’t stand when I’m on fire for God and then slip into sin. I mean, yes, I was a sinner, but I’ve been redeemed and made a new creation in Christ.

That doesn’t mean I don’t still fall into temptation and fail to flee. When it happens, I don’t know how to feel. While I understand grace and mercy, I don’t want to abuse them. There were times I asked God to search my heart and deliver me from hidden sin… then bam! Sudden temptations caused me to slip, and I felt stupid again.

The last time I fell into sin, I didn’t repent. I asked myself, “What’s the point of repenting if it could happen again?”

After 3–4 days of not praying or repenting, I heard the word “willful” in my spirit. I knew it meant “on purpose,” but I looked it up anyway. Other words were rebellious, uncooperative, and stubborn?

I then went to what God’s word said about the word “willful.” I opened the Bible App and typed the word into the search bar. I found Hebrews 10:26.

Hebrews 10:26, NKJV
26 “For if we sin willfully after we have received the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins,”

Yes, I felt stupid—that my repentance wouldn’t be from a genuine heart. I kept dwelling on the transforming God has been doing in my life. All the time I spent seeking Him, and I honestly felt I was genuinely getting closer to Him. Just to end up in a position that made me feel far from Him? To feel like I gave His enemy a one-up on Him?

I needed more motivation and encouragement from the Word, so I began my online research.

One writer specifically helped me, they wrote:

“If someone is determined to live an unchristian life even after ‘receiving the knowledge of the truth’ (Hebrews 10:26), we might assume they never accepted Christ in the first place. If they willfully commit the same sin over and over again—without remorse and without showing any evidence of genuine desire to change—we would doubt the sincerity of their faith.”

The interpretation I researched increased my faith and strength to pray. I didn’t sin on purpose, but unfortunately I didn’t flee or walk away. I recognized that Hebrews 10:26–31 wasn’t a direct reference to struggling Christians like me. But targeting the hardened hearts of people who only pretend to be Christians.

Then, the writer continued to say:

“Yet in your case, beloved, we feel sure of better things—things that belong to salvation” (Hebrews 6:9). The fact that you’re wrestling with doubts and fears about your standing with God leads us to think that you can’t be guilty of rejecting Christ. If you were, you wouldn’t be worried about it.”

If someone you know is struggling with shame and doubt after falling into sin. Remind them, yes, our sinful nature is still in us. We sometimes do wrong things even though, deep down, we don’t want to. However, to sin on purpose continually and without a repentant heart, that will separate us from God.

But a righteous man falls and gets up and repents!

Repenting is turning from sin to God. We should establish boundaries and cut off places, people, or things that cause us to sin. This is how we protect ourselves from going down a rabbit hole of darkness leading to death.

If you are down on hope and need reassurance, remember what John told us:

1 John 1:7–9, NKJV
7 But if we walk in the light as He is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus Christ His Son cleanses us from all sin. 8 If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. 9 If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

I felt foolish for falling into sin and hid from God, but not enough to stay away forever. I sat in shame and fear, then finally whispered a prayer of repentance. Not only did I receive forgiveness—He gave me peace. He restored my joy. He comforted me in my despair. And now, I have wisdom and understanding in an area that once kept me feeling crippled.

This is my testimony. A time when God spoke to me while I was too ashamed to speak to Him. A single word, “willful,” led me into a deeper connection with God. I saw that He understood my groans and spoke to me in a way He knew I would receive. Praise God!

This piece helped me get to the moment I felt strengthen enough to pray boldly again.

Article of Reference, WILLFUL SIN AFTER SALVATION AND ETERNAL SECURITY